The Camelopardophant in the Zoo of Heraldic Beasts

You humans don’t realise how demeaning this is. And boring. For me anyhow.

The griffin, the unicorn, even the cockatrice have their fans. And Leroy over there gets a stream of visitors. “Do rampant!” They say. “Do couchant!” And he obliges. He’s a trooper.

Well, actually he’s a lion and an egomaniac. But that’s Leroy.

Not me. I don’t get the requests. Does anyone have me on a shield? The only visitors I get say: “What’s this funny looking thing?”

I say: You want funny? Look in a mirror!

No, I don’t. Can’t speak, can I? But think it and try to transmit my contempt by telepathy.

Heraldic Camelopardophant

© TheSupercargo


The above was written for the Friday Fictioneers flash fiction forum. The prompt: what appears to be a large soft toy animal with the hindquarters of a zebra, the body of a tiger, the forequarters giraffe and the trunk of an elephant. Obviously a camelopardophant! As ever the Friday Fictioneers target is 100 words – as ever I fail to hit it, but the above is only 107 words long. To see a list of links to all the responses to this week’s Friday Fictioneers prompt, click here.